If you’ve ever wished you had a recording of incriminating audio – or had a permanent record of your own witty comeback – a new iPhone app, billed as the app that allows users to ‘capture audio AFTER you’ve heard it’ could be the answer.
The app, called Heard, records everything the iPhone microphone picks up on a constantly rotating five-minute loop.
If something happens that you want to keep a record of, 30 seconds, two minutes, or even five minutes later, you can go into the app and press ‘save’. Do nothing, and the app erases the audio.
This is the creepiest shit I have ever heard. Here is an app that is going to turn your phone microphone into a 5 minute looped wire. Yea…wire…like the kind a snitch wears to a drug deal. This is bad. This is super shitty. If your phone can be used by YOU as a surveillance device….then who else can use it as a surveillance device? Maybe Uncle Sam? Maybe a significant other?? There is no viable reason for this to exist other then to get people into trouble.
Let me paint you this picture. You download this app….your wife knows about it….you are watching the game with your buddies and she asks you to slow down with your beer consumption….she goes back into the kitchen (where she belongs) and you blurt out,”Wow…what a bitch!!”….maybe,”Eat a dick you CUNT”…or the ever classic…”Fuck you”. She comes back into the room and picks up your phone off of the coffee table. Now….you are super fucked. She listens back a minute and BAM! All of your buddies are kicked out of the house before the game is over….you look like an idiot….and you probably aren’t getting laid for a month!!! Not to mention that you have to watch EVERYTHING that you say….EVER. Who wants to live like that?!?! Definitely not someone who writes for a blog called BrokenFilter.net. I was born to say whatever the fuck I want to….I just don’t always want my wife to hear it….I love you baby.
Now…that is just a basic scenario involving a tiny marital snafu. What if you are drinking with your buddies and big brother is listening? I know the app will have all sorts of disclaimers stating how “it is for your own private use and no audio will ever be distributed to a third party”…blah…blah…blah. We all know that the Patriot Act lets the government listen to whatever the fuck they want to….and now there is an app to listen from the iPhone microphones….that people are going to install themselves!?!? The government must be ecstatic. One less thing that they have to try to hide from you. You are gonna basically give them the ability to just tune in whenever they want. So back to the next scenario….drinking with your buddies….people start talking about the head honcho himself…..Mr. Obama. Maybe you had tee many martoonis and start saying that the country would be better off if Obama had an “accident”. That my kind friend is what our government agencies call a “red flag”. Next thing you know you wake up in Guantanamo Bay getting water boarded like you had brown skin on September 12, 2001.
It says that the audio gets erased if not saved?? Remember when people believed that shit from the makers of “SnapChat”? Yea…sure…the photos get deleted….no problem….sext it up all you want. Send some dick pics, tit pics….whatever you want. All it took was a few months and a few tech savvy people and BAM! Now there are multiple ways to retrieve pictures of your girlfriend finger poppin her own beef curtains. You think there won’t be a way with the audio?? Or maybe a way to hack your phone through the carrier network, wifi, or any other internet connection in order to hear the audio streaming live?? That is just naive. No thanks. I will NOT be downloading this nightmare. I say too much dumb shit on a daily basis to want a constant recording device in my pocket. Nope. Never.