Rosie O’Donnell is “happy to be alive” after suffering a heart attack last week.
O’Donnell, 50, wrote that she began experiencing symptoms, such as sore arms and an ache in her chest, on Tuesday after helping “an enormous woman/struggling to get out of her car.”
After a Google search suggested she was having a heart attack, O’Donnell said she took Bayer Aspirin, but did not call 911.
In a way it’s sort of sad to know that somebody could be so far removed from a formerly successful career that they have to spend their life savings running for President just to become relevant again. Oh, wait, am I thinking of Roseanne Barr? Yeah, I am. But they both were never funny except to middle-aged and older housewives, and they’re both disgusting bovine creatures.
That’s my new term, by the way. Slow-moving, enormous blobs of fat. Cattle. At least Rosie wasn’t afraid to stand up for herself since she’s a lez. But still. Never laughed at her once. It sucks because sassy fat chicks are pretty funny until they start writing their own jokes. Let some Jewish guy write jokes for you, sassy fat chicks. They know how to exploit your funny features.
PS: Rosie, were YOU the enormous woman struggling to get out of the car?