CNN: Hooking up with the rich may even improve the quality of sex, at least for women. In a 2009 study (PDF), researchers at Newcastle University found that as male partners’ income increased, so did the frequency of women’s orgasms.
Could money act as an aphrodisiac? Maybe. Or, as the study’s authors suggest, perhaps wealth-inspired orgasms are the result of evolution, helping women discriminate between men to find those that have the best provider potential.
“Now I ain’t sayin’ she’s a gold-digger. But she ain’t messin’ with no broke African American individuals.”
Science FTW! We finally, FINALLY found objective, scientific statistics explaining that women have more orgasms when banging men with money. But wait. Are they actual orgasms, or are they whoregasms?
Whoregasm – (as defined by me) The event whereby a whore fakes an orgasm in order to achieve some ulterior motive, which usually involves advancing her socio-economic status via fucking rich dudes until the rich dudes trust them, then the whores take their money.
Gold Digger – (as defined by me) A whore who frequently has whoregasms (see whoregasm).
Is this not EXACTLY what I’ve been saying? Modern man no longer lives in the wild. He exists in a complex society. But nature pervades even modern, urban life. Survival of the fittest, natural selection occur in many ways. In order to guarantee survival, one must advance their standing in the world. In modern society, that standing is socio-economic. Gold-digging whores will use whoregasms as as their way to climb the socio-economic status, thus participating in, and continuing this dance of eternity that we call survival.
CNN agrees with me. “perhaps wealth-inspired orgasms are the result of evolution, helping women discriminate between men to find those that have the best provider potential.”
I should be a scientist.